^ banned for measuring the cup but not knowing how to measure a pinch, a dash, or a smidgen

Banned for using witchcraft measurements instead of metrics or even imperial.

Banned for playing Witchaven instead of Hexen or even Heretic.

Banned because I'm playing Daikatana instead.

^ banned because you love solving the frustrating reCAPTCHA just to log in to purchase a game or make a post

Banned for re-posting a post from before.

Banned for re-posting a post from the future.

^ banned for creating a temporal paradox causal loop

Banned for calling a plumber to fix your time machine.

^ banned because my time machine is a stationary mass, temporal displacement unit of my own design and manufactured by General Electric... My unit is energized by two, top-spin, dual-positive singularities which produce a standard, off-set Tipler sinusoid; I can effectuate repairs on my own without outside assistance.

Banned for being flexible enough to toot your own horn.

Banned for being horny for that kind of tooting.

Banned for not using a flux capacitor.

^ banned for flexing your flux beyond its capacity

Banned for not making the Delorean into a transformer

^ banned, because a time traveling transformer is what caused the extinction of the dinosaurs the first time