To reduce the amount of negativity in the world, I say we ban numbers smaller than zero.

I'd rather say we ban complex numbers and imaginary ones to ensure the world is easy comprehensible and in linear order.

Me to myself: "I'd like to tackle the pile of dirty dishes sitting in my kitchen sink, but I just washed my hair. Bye!"

I used to be indecisive, but now, I'm not so sure...

It's "righty tighty, lefty loosey." Capisce?

Geez, it's like you've never used a screwdriver before!

My anti-malware software has detected a virus threat on my computer! Thank goodness I'm sat here at my keyboard, wearing a protective face mask and a pair of vinyl medical gloves!

This is the Massively Multiplayable Offline George Lucas Syndrome (or MMO-GLS), from inception to death:
- Got lucky one night
- Have no idea how or why it was so good for many
- Continues to scratch the imaginary itch until it gets worse and worse
- Pokes and probes so hard making it impossible to cure it
- Throwing up uncontrollably on their own hands and spreads the disease
- Eventually giving it off to be mercilessly killed by a soulless company

I want to start a Dolphin hatchery, but I live in a desert and nobody wants to loan me their swimming pool and let me fill it up with saltwater.

At the start of the year, I made a joke about finally having 2020 vision.

I was so, so wrong.

But that doesn't make sense. Isn't the current year 2077?

Lasers and masers and tasers, oh my!

Just great fuel 1/3 of my income goes to complete strangers who want me and my family and friends dead.
Please wont sum one get Pres. Trunk teh f***in' lunch codes FFS!!!

Banned because if Kratos is the God of War, then who is the God of Cheese?

This is either the greatest non sequitur of all time, or posted in the wrong thread. I honestly can't tell which; and for that, I salute you.

Aristaeus.