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Hello Again,

You guys helped me out last time, so once again I am here back from idling and just lurking to ask for help
Since you guys are obviously much older than I am, you have much more experience in this matter.

So first a bit about myself
I am a 18 year old male high school student, senior.
That's all I think I need to tell you to help me out in terms of my background.

So the situation, No, not the one from jersey shore.

So I am friends with this pretty lady, and we recently like 4 weeks ago made out, and now it's gotten to the point where, well, she is sneaking into my house to just cuddle and make out and stuff, and well, just today something happened and it escalated quickly, To be polite, her hands were around Sir John Thomas and my hands were doing Dj practice so to speak.

Now, at this rate, I am worried that it's going to escalate to the point where we are having intercourse, and I don't know whether or not I am ready for that, I am moving away for college in two months or so, and she's not moving.

So I don't know what to do, or what to think. I am conflicted, A part of me enjoys her company and the warmth she provides, the other part thinks that this is morally wrong, and that i shouldn't be doing this, it's a weird form of guilt, guilt over what? I do not know, My parents don't know about this, so perhaps the secrecy of this is turning it into guilt.

So Honestly, I am conflicted, and confused, Unironic I know, pretty much every other teenager is, And since you folks were teenagers once, I want your advice on this situation, Do you regret your first time, and so on.

I know this is a ridiculous situation to be asked about on a gaming website, But I feel as if you guys have the experience and the respect to advice me in this situation, Sorry for the long post.

Thank you
Post edited May 13, 2014 by corawesome2
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Like I always say.

When in doubt, whip it out.
You'll get a hundred answers from a hundred men and women. I hope you'll take time and care to listen and judge well.

This type of thing happened to me (minus the Johnson and DJ bit). So let me tell you about my quick trip:

- Promised myself not to date mid-to-late senior year b/c I was leaving for school
- I fell in love and dated. We were perfect together. Like two peas in a pod.
- We moved 600 miles apart and tried to date
- When we did finally see each other, things were intense and passionate
- I was falling behind in classes. Long-distance relationship are near impossible to maintain.
- We finally broke up in my sophomore year of college. I was crippled with depression for months. And didn't care to date anyone for at least a year afterwards. It was all a waste of time and effort for something that would never be.


So, to decide rationally (which rarely happens when a Johnson is involved):

First, make a plan. What do you want to do in the next few months? (college) How does she fit into that plan?
Do you care about her? Deeply?

In two months, you can get pretty into each other (no pun intended). In four months, you will be willing to throw away your education for her. Almost guaranteed.

So, my advice would be to tell her that it's too much too fast. You don't think you should see her any more b/c you're leaving to college. And you should move on. And tell your parents what happened. It'll bring you closer to your parents and develop that relationship that will last a long time.

Or take my other advice if you're in love with her: Figure out what you want sexually and figure out the boundaries you need to have to keep those urges at bay. I personally lasted until marriage before intercourse and I strongly recommend it for everyone. But since about 4% of people do that, I imagine it's fairly hard. I can't think of anything I've ever done that was that hard. It builds character. But there's tons of others that will tell you to screw and screw often. I never saw any good come out of it (from friends and family: several abortions, pregnancies, poverty, lost education, depression, abuse and a little bit of fun that later turned into shame -- but I'm told by others that they have no regrets, too [but they do have left-over effects from STDs and, later, adultery and/or divorce])

As for me, I took the bottom advice, it went very poorly. But then 5 or 6 years later, we hooked back up and got married. Been married for 7 years next Monday. But that's very rare.

All this said, she's got your Johnson and there's not much that anyone can say that will get you to get her to release it. Good luck, mate. :)
your 1st time? fun!. i'm lucky (or regret it perhaps to not have your kinda situation...) got help from more experience partner. if i were you just go , you still young go there and and have fun with her.
Post edited May 13, 2014 by sinugie
Ask her to do all sorts of freaky stuff, anything you can think of. If she doesn't say "no" to anything, marry her .
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corawesome2: Now, at this rate, I am worried that it's going to escalate to the point where we are having intercourse, and I don't know whether or not I am ready for that, I am moving away for college in two months or so, and she's not moving.

So I don't know what to do, or what to think. I am conflicted, A part of me enjoys her company and the warmth she provides, the other part thinks that this is morally wrong, and that i shouldn't be doing this, it's a weird form of guilt, guilt over what? I do not know, My parents don't know about this, so perhaps the secrecy of this is turning it into guilt.
You sort of skimped on the details about her, does she realize that you're moving away soon? Is she the same age as you etc.?

First, make sure that she knows you're moving away soon, and if she still wants to go for it, make sure to bring condoms.

You shouldn't really have anything to feel guilty about as long as you are honest with her.
Not sure what to tell you. We're all different and you're at a point in life where there are a lot of things bouncing around in your head and hormones.

As for the morality, not really. Are you hurting someone? Stealing from someone? No? Then don't sweat it. Go get some jimmy-hats just in case so you don't end up with a life-changing situation that you're not prepared to deal with. And I wouldn't have her sneaking in to see you; it's your folks house and you should respect that. Basically, you're an adult at 18 years old, so assume the responsibilities.

Other than that, talk to her about it. If she has a problem with your concerns then maybe she's not the best choice for now. If she's cool with it, then things will hopefully progress in a manner comfortable to both of you. Might not hurt to talk with your parents, but that comes from me not knowing a thing about your family life.

And if this doesn't feel like the right time, then it probably isn't the right time. There will be other opportunities and you'll be facing the same questions again.

But really, don't over-think it. Just talk with her, and be responsible with whatever you decide.
3 simple words:

Dip, the, wick.
Dude... just feel her warmth! Feel it nice and hard!
avatar
Licurg: Ask her to do all sorts of freaky stuff, anything you can think of. If she doesn't say "no" to anything, marry her .
that is usually a sign she wouldn't say no to other men too.
i think he should be careful.
Does she know you're leaving? Have you talked to her about this? It's an entirely different situation if she understands that the relationship will come to a forced end when you leave for college, or if she expects that the relationship will continue in some form. If she knows and accepts that this relationship will not be able to continue then I don't see any ethical issues. Be truthful and honest with her, and if she still wants to go ahead then there's no issue with doing so. As far as your parents go, you're 18 now. Your love life is your own business. Whether you choose to share that information with them is your prerogative.

The harder question is whether you want to go ahead with this. No matter your decision, you might regret it or be thankful for it one day. It's difficult to say how you'll feel five or ten years down the road. Think about it, and consciously make a decision (do not leave it to the heat of the moment) ahead of time, then go forward without regrets. Above all else, if you do choose to go ahead do be safe about it.
Not saying you should do this, but it might solve your current situation and help focus on studying during college.
I would email support.

Tell them you've downloaded a game and now you're not sure you want to play it.
Post edited May 13, 2014 by grimwerk
avatar
grimwerk: I would email support.

Tell them you've download a game and now you're not sure you want to play it.
Thank god he's got a game that would support his joystick.
avatar
pimpmonkey2382: Like I always say.

When in doubt, whip it out.
Congrats, that made me laugh like a mad man.
avatar
Tallima: You'll get a hundred answers from a hundred men and women. I hope you'll take time and care to listen and judge well.

This type of thing happened to me (minus the Johnson and DJ bit). So let me tell you about my quick trip:

- Promised myself not to date mid-to-late senior year b/c I was leaving for school
- I fell in love and dated. We were perfect together. Like two peas in a pod.
- We moved 600 miles apart and tried to date
- When we did finally see each other, things were intense and passionate
- I was falling behind in classes. Long-distance relationship are near impossible to maintain.
- We finally broke up in my sophomore year of college. I was crippled with depression for months. And didn't care to date anyone for at least a year afterwards. It was all a waste of time and effort for something that would never be.


So, to decide rationally (which rarely happens when a Johnson is involved):

First, make a plan. What do you want to do in the next few months? (college) How does she fit into that plan?
Do you care about her? Deeply?

In two months, you can get pretty into each other (no pun intended). In four months, you will be willing to throw away your education for her. Almost guaranteed.

So, my advice would be to tell her that it's too much too fast. You don't think you should see her any more b/c you're leaving to college. And you should move on. And tell your parents what happened. It'll bring you closer to your parents and develop that relationship that will last a long time.

Or take my other advice if you're in love with her: Figure out what you want sexually and figure out the boundaries you need to have to keep those urges at bay. I personally lasted until marriage before intercourse and I strongly recommend it for everyone. But since about 4% of people do that, I imagine it's fairly hard. I can't think of anything I've ever done that was that hard. It builds character. But there's tons of others that will tell you to screw and screw often. I never saw any good come out of it (from friends and family: several abortions, pregnancies, poverty, lost education, depression, abuse and a little bit of fun that later turned into shame -- but I'm told by others that they have no regrets, too [but they do have left-over effects from STDs and, later, adultery and/or divorce])

As for me, I took the bottom advice, it went very poorly. But then 5 or 6 years later, we hooked back up and got married. Been married for 7 years next Monday. But that's very rare.

All this said, she's got your Johnson and there's not much that anyone can say that will get you to get her to release it. Good luck, mate. :)
Well, Lets see,
what do you want to do in the next few months? Summer Intership and (college)
How does she fit into that plan? Just a good friend who I am trying to convince to go to college.
Do you care about her? Yes, otherwise i wouldn't spend hours trying to motivate her to be more productive, good though though is that she listens.
Deeply? Not sure.

She too thinks it is moving a bit fast, so i am not sure. And congratulations on keeping those urges at bay, i personally would like to do this aswell.

As for her having my johnson, eh it's not like she's forcing me to do anything, extremely understanding, to a fault.
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sinugie: your 1st time? fun!. i'm lucky (or regret it perhaps to not have your kinda situation...) got help from more experience partner. if i were you just go , you still young go there and and have fun with her.
Thanks for the input.
avatar
Licurg: Ask her to do all sorts of freaky stuff, anything you can think of. If she doesn't say "no" to anything, marry her .
She isn't going to do any "freaky" stuff, however she does do random crap i think of to make her uncomfortable, Doesn't work.
avatar
djdarko: You sort of skimped on the details about her, does she realize that you're moving away soon? Is she the same age as you etc.?

First, make sure that she knows you're moving away soon, and if she still wants to go for it, make sure to bring condoms.

You shouldn't really have anything to feel guilty about as long as you are honest with her.
She does realize i am moving away soon, i am trying to convince her to go to college near where i am going.
Yes she is around the same age then me, eh a few months older actually.
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HereForTheBeer: Not sure what to tell you. We're all different and you're at a point in life where there are a lot of things bouncing around in your head and hormones.

As for the morality, not really. Are you hurting someone? Stealing from someone? No? Then don't sweat it. Go get some jimmy-hats just in case so you don't end up with a life-changing situation that you're not prepared to deal with. And I wouldn't have her sneaking in to see you; it's your folks house and you should respect that. Basically, you're an adult at 18 years old, so assume the responsibilities.

Other than that, talk to her about it. If she has a problem with your concerns then maybe she's not the best choice for now. If she's cool with it, then things will hopefully progress in a manner comfortable to both of you. Might not hurt to talk with your parents, but that comes from me not knowing a thing about your family life.

And if this doesn't feel like the right time, then it probably isn't the right time. There will be other opportunities and you'll be facing the same questions again.

But really, don't over-think it. Just talk with her, and be responsible with whatever you decide.
Well i am not sure how i would talk to my parents about it, As for hurting anyone, i don't think so, i appreciate the input, not sure how i will talk about it, and i am pretty sure it's not the right time, but should i get some "jimmy-hats" just in case?
avatar
pimpmonkey2382: 3 simple words:

Dip, the, wick.
I assume that is a euphemism.
avatar
darthspudius: Dude... just feel her warmth! Feel it nice and hard!
Hahahahaha, you guys are in coalition to make me laugh aren't you.
Post edited May 13, 2014 by corawesome2