XeonicDevil: so true, i mean it's hard to tell if a guy is being hostile, worried, has anxiety, is scared, is legitimately messing with everyone.
because up to 7 tells in human behavior was lost.
i once asked my friends if i was pissing them off over discord.
and i worded it so badly they took it as a attack.
no more friends.

i know i am loud and dumb too.. no oner is flawless.
i mean no man harm, even tho people.. killed my father.. people.. messed up my arm.. people destroyed my life as much as i did.. i still help anyone i can because i like paying it forward to life.}

do you think life granted me the same blessings? no.. i had to scour the floor upward just like everyone else.

i have been worth 11billion and worth 0 cents and all i had to do for it to all goto hell was.. live and wait for chaos.

even so.. with a broken body.. i wake up, pick up my toolbox, ride my cheap bike and fix pc's on the go.. for dirt in pay, while my sister plots my demise, my mom is on her last heels.
and i am in medical debt for life because it took me 3 years to prove my employer fabricated i was a epileptic and they pretty much dosed me like a zombie at the hospital even tho 5 tests were negative.

meanwhile i am having my 900th anxiety attack... triggering my heart to stop.
thanks for nearly killing my medical wonders...
and the reason.. free test subject.

so i get a lawyer, takes my case, she goes silent and turns up in a mental institute 3 months later.

i try get my high school diploma back and my engineering certs.. and the college tells me the had a data breach so they dont have my data.. the high schools record burned down 17 years ago.

and i wake up every day, i walk down the street, i greet everyone with open arms and love.

i buy a expensive laptop.. it's a paper weight in less than a year.. somehow this is a extended warranty and all that broke is a halll effect sensor... yet the support and repairs acting like this warrants 25% of the price.
should have just voided the warranty and fixed it han solo..

so yeah.. my brain leaks despair now and then.
you start asking.. am i the only one watching the matrix code.. really mess with you. 4th wall breaking matrix hell.
ever watched Final Destination?

sometimes i wish i could mind meld like Total Recall.. open your mind....OPEN YOUR MIND.... stuff i could show you all.

XD

P. Zimerickus: reminds me of this 'challenge' we are doin at the work atm, What stays on the job, stays on the job.... Well actually it started with little 'ol me keeping me family, especially the female ones out of my daily concerns... financials... true feelings etc ...... guess it worked for me, now i'm trying to see if this will work for others too ;-p